


Pie Day

by Aurora_Novarum



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: 1000-3000 words, Crack, Crossover, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Pre-Canon, Season/Series 08, Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-07
Updated: 2009-12-07
Packaged: 2017-10-04 06:18:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aurora_Novarum/pseuds/Aurora_Novarum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack discovers a new holiday being celebrated on Level 19.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pie Day

**Author's Note:**

> Birthday fic. Set post New Order in SG-1, and pre-The Rising in SGA.

General Jack O'Neill entered the elevator, finding it already occupied with two airmen he didn't recognize. He nodded politely and tried to wave off their straightening to attention. He was so not used to this "general" thing yet. And the two airmen looked like they were just out of high school, although the captain's bars on the woman belied that assessment. He swore they were looking younger every year.

The elevator moved up a few floors before the doors opened once again. Siler stepped inside, exchanging a friendly nod with Jack. The elevator doors started to close again, when O'Neill stuck out his arm to arrest the movement. He could've sworn he'd smelled something out of place. He pushed the doors open further and stuck his head out into the hallway.

Yep, he was still smelling it–the waft of freshly baked goods permeated the air. He glanced back at the elevator display. This was Level 19, full of the science labs, not the commissary. He realized the others were staring at him. "Sir?" Siler questioned.

"Do you smell...?"

"Yes, sir." Siler gave a crisp nod, but said nothing further, even after Jack stared at him a few moments.

Jack thought, not for the first time, that the man could give Teal'c lessons in how to be taciturn. No matter, if desserts were the issue, the general felt it was up to him to do a first-hand investigation. He stepped out of the elevator. "Carry on," he waved, getting some amusement at the wide eyes of the airmen as the doors closed on them.

If this turned out to be some alien version of a scented candle imitating the smell of tasty desserts, Jack would be sorely disappointed. But no, he caught sight of one of the scientists, Ranee, Rachel, Roxanne–he knew it was an R name--from the physics department walking towards one of the labs with a cake platter. Maybe it was something as simple as a department birthday party. Jack paused slightly, wondering if it would be gauche to crash it. Then he decided he could pass by as base commander wishing many happy returns...and if he got some cake too, well, that would just be a bonus perk. There could be advantages to being the general. From the smells surrounding him, it almost seemed like he was heading for a bakery. Could one cake smell so good?

He followed the scientist around the corner and heard music playing as she opened the door. He stepped inside and almost stepped back out in surprise.

The lab was crowded with people. Music and conversations vied at drowning each other out. Reams of paper dotted the walls, filled with numbers typed in a large font. Every flat surface seemed to be covered with baked goods. Actually, now that Jack looked closer, he realized they were all pies.

"General! So glad you're here!" Jack was accosted by a small, balding man approaching him with a plastic cup.

"Doctor Lee."

"Isn't it great?" Lee beamed at him. "Sergeant Siler was good enough to help fix the sound system for us. I mean, to tell the truth, we didn't expect this large a turnout, but I'd forgotten scientists heading down to the Antarctica expedition were here for an orientation conference. Luckily the e-mails got everyone to bring more desserts, and I think we have enough for everybody!"

"Ah," Jack responded. Lee seemed to be under the impression that Jack knew what the hell was going on. "And 'it' is...?"

"Oh!" Lee blinked. "Well, it's pi day, of course!"

"Pie day?" Jack repeated. "As opposed to...cake day? They really do make a holiday for everything now, don't they?"

Lee laughed. "No, no, no. I mean, yes. But it's not pie day for desserts, it's pi day for the number. Don't you see?" He pointed to the papers set up as a makeshift wallpaper border. "Pi. 3.14159 etc., etc... It's March 14th, so 3/14 becomes 3.14 and pi becomes pie as a pun. Get it?"

"Of course that's only going by the American way of listing a date month, day, and then year. " O'Neill turned to the new voice. He recognized this scientist, not McCoy, McKay. The guy who Carter said was behind that arbitrary 48 hour deadline that almost killed Teal'c. He kind of helped that time Anubis tried to blow up the SGC with the Stargate, but that didn't mean Jack didn't still hold a grudge. Besides, it was Jonas and Carter who came up with the crazy idea that worked.

McKay was still talking. "Civilized countries of the world follow a logical pattern of increments, day to month to year."

"Rodney, it's just desserts." A bespectacled man with a thick Eastern European accent stood nearby with a plate containing a half-eaten piece of a fruit pie in his hand. "Until April has a 31st day, following American tradition is the only way pi day will work. What is the expression? When in Rome?"

"Yes, yes." Rodney waved off his response. "I still say it's a sign of typical American arrogance."

"I notice that does not stop you from eating the pies," his counterpart noted wryly.

"Well, as guests, I figure we have to be polite," McKay mumbled over a mouthful of pie.

Lee finally was able to get a word in edgewise between the two scientists. "General Jack O'Neill, may I introduce Doctor Rodney McKay and Doctor Rada-radeek, oh dear."

"Radek Zalenka," the European smoothly corrected the pronunciation and reached to shake O'Neill's hand. "A pleasure, General. I'm amazed by everything we're learning about the program. And of course your contribution in initializing the chair..."

"Yeah, thanks." O'Neill fumbled. He always hated small talk, much less talking about Antarctica. It's why he'd avoided much contact with the science group up till now.

"Ah, yes, General. Of course. We-we've met before." Apparently McKay remembered their previous encounters even better than O'Neill did. A stint in Siberia would probably do that. Geez, Siberia. Antarctica should make him feel right at home.

McKay, however, did not seem to have established a self-preservation instinct as the next words out of his mouth were: "You haven't seen Major Carter around, have you?"

"You mean, Lieutenant Colonel Carter," O'Neill replied, bristling automatically.

"Hmm, yes, I guess she did get promoted. Anyway I was hoping to discuss with her..."

"Isn't that her, over there?" Lee interrupted, pointing to a blond head over at the other end of the room.

"Oh, really?" McKay shoved his empty plate into Zelenka's hand and headed over where Lee had pointed.

Jack looked from the blond figure McKay was chasing down and then turned back to Lee. "Unless you've got some kind of miniaturization project going on, I don't think that's Carter."

"It's not, " Lee confirmed. "It's Chloe, Dr. Felger's research assistant. Hopefully she'll forgive me, but I think working daily with Jay has given her immunity to all sorts of things, including Rodney McKay." Lee bent down to take a bite pie and muttered "He's been driving me crazy, correcting calculations on the gamekeeper programming. Okay, so he was right that the algorithm was way off track, but still..."

O'Neill heard Zelenka chuckle. Suppressing his own smirk, Jack asked, "So, have any idea where Carter really is?"

"Hmm..." Lee paused and swallowed, then pointed with his fork. "She may be over there. I think that's where the rest of her team perched."

"Thanks." O'Neill took a deep breath to wade further amongst the geeks. He paused to nod to Zelenka out of politeness. " Good luck in Antarctica. Dress...warm."

"Thank you, General."

Jack could tell he already wasn't missed as Lee and Zelenka launched into a conversation that could well have been a different language. Jack wound his way through the crowd, trying to pick out Carter. Before he spotted her, he caught sight of two other familiar figures.

Lee had mentioned her team, but Jack had just presumed it was a lab team. Instead he saw the other two members of SG-1 hanging out near one of the tables of pie. Jack was surprised to see Daniel wearing some kind of hat, complete with a silver disk. He looked like one of those old fashioned doctors like in a Norman Rockwell painting. He headed over.

"Fancy meeting you here."

"Hey, Jack." Daniel smiled and waved with his fork in greeting.

"O'Neill." Teal'c bowed his head.

Jack drummed his fingers along the table, looking at all the pies nearby. He grinned at Daniel. "Going for that medical degree now?"

"Hmm?" Daniel looked at him quizzically. Jack raised his eyebrows and nodded up to Daniel's forehead. Daniel reached up and pulled the item off his head. "Oh, I forgot I still had that. Seems during one of the seminars today, Sam mentioned how we used pi to finally contact the Asgard on Cimmeria. I've been made a guest of honor."

"Ah." Jack turned to Teal'c. "And how'd you end up at the math geek party?"

Teal'c tilted his head and looked at O'Neill as if he were a particularly dense child. "There was pie."

"Right." Jack looked down and waved his hand across the pie-filled table. "Any recommendations?"

"This chocolate peanut butter pie is delicious," Daniel answered, taking another bite. Swallowing quickly, he added. "Oh, but I think I took the last piece. Sorry."

Jack wasn't sure how sincere that apology was. He was tempted to grab the rest of the pie off Daniel's plate just for the reaction. But instead his vision focused on one of the pies still on the table. Coconut creme pie. And Jack could tell from here it was made with real meringue, not that fake canned stuff so often used anymore. Jack cut himself a thick slice and grabbed a plate and fork.

After savoring a bite, he licked a bit of meringue off his fork and asked, "So, where's Carter?"

"Here, sir." Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter appeared at his elbow grinning. "Glad you could make it."

"Thanks for not inviting me." Jack flashed a wry smile.

To his surprise, Carter's eyebrows rose innocently. "I did invite you, sir."

"You did?" Jack searched his memory. He knew a lot went by him, but not as much as people thought. "I think I would've recalled pie coming up as a conversation topic."

"Oh, no, sir. Things have been so busy with the orientations. I meant the memo."

"Memo?"

"Yes, sir." Carter continued to look at him innocently, but her eyes were widening a bit too much, like they always did when she was trying to look earnest when she was either really being sneaky or trying not to laugh. Jack suspected both.

Good teammate that he was, Daniel covered for his commander with a counterattack, damn him. "I thought you said you were starting to read your memos now, Jack? You promised you'd pay attention to the memo I sent on Chinese dynastic artifacts found on P—"

"Ah! I know what I said, Daniel." Jack lifted his fork and glared at his friend, noticing that unlike Carter, Daniel was making no attempts to hide his amusement.

"Then you would've been aware of the party," Daniel countered.

"At least you're here now," Carter noted brightly.

Changing the subject, Jack polished off another big mouthful. "Yes, and this pie is...mmmm. Have you tried?"

She wrinkled her nose. "I'm not a big fan of coconut, sir."

Jack shrugged. No accounting for taste. "Daniel ate all the chocolate."

"Chocolate peanut butter." Daniel protested. "There's a few different chocolate pies over...

"That's all right, Daniel," Sam reassured him. "I'll probably get some...lemon, or key lime. Perhaps it can help me ward off McKay."

Jack nodded. "Yeah, he was looking for you when I arrived."

Out of the corner of his eye, Jack noted Teal'c straighten and scan the room. "Is he bothering you, Colonel Carter? I can confront him..." His eyes held a dangerous sparkle.

"No, that's okay, Teal'c. I can handle it. I'm just practicing avoidance tactics at the moment. It seems the most...diplomatic approach."

Daniel chuckled. "Yeah, and I'm sure Elizabeth would like her chief scientist arriving with all his body parts intact." He nodded over to where the head of the Antarctica expedition, Doctor Elizabeth Weir was laughing with a few of her people–a Japanese woman and two Germans going by the flag patches Jack spotted.

To Jack's surprise, Carter defended McKay. "He did help a lot with the X-302 plan. And I've been reviewing some of his newer papers. He's a brilliant scientist, he's just...just...McKay."

Teal'c grimaced. "Indeed."

Daniel kept glancing between Jack and the pies. Jack's spidey sense was tingling. Something was up in Daniel's brain, and it was more than just racing Jack to another piece of pie. Jack didn't have to wait long.

Daniel set down his plate and shifted his gaze more to Carter while addressing Jack. "So, um, Jack. I've been talking to Sam, and Elizabeth. And there's a lot of Ancient info to translate down in Antarctica, more being uncovered every day by the advance team. And while Dr. Weir is learning Ancient, I'm still the most qualified person in the program."

Oh boy, Jack had been expecting this. The whole continent had brought him nothing but trouble, but that wouldn't stop Daniel from his eternal excitement over anything Ancient. To his surprise Carter looked just as intrigued. Did she not remember the whole almost freezing to death incident?

She started building on Daniel's lead. "There is a lot of technology down there, sir. The chair, not to mention the power source you discovered on Praclarush Taonas, could have so many implications it would be fascinating to study. Perhaps SG-1 could be temporarily assigned..."

"No! No-no-no." He thought quickly, not willing to admit he didn't want to let any of them out of his sight at the moment. He wasn't used to being in charge of the whole base. Letting his team go out without him was bad enough. Despite being on the same planet, Antarctica seemed worlds away than any Stargate destination. How would Hammond handle this? He looked at the members of SG-1. One's disappointment would be tolerable. Both would drive him crazy. Whose moping would he be able to tolerate better? Einey-meinie-miney... Nope, Daniel's pestering would drive him nuts.

"I can't okay all of you. Too much of a military presence may counteract all the negotiating Weir's been working. Liz can borrow–and I mean borrow--you, Daniel. You're civilian, and can teach the others more Ancient rather than this quick immersion class you've been trying."

He waved his arm aimlessly at the international grouping. "Plus you'd bore Teal'c," he finished lamely.

Teal'c bowed his head with an ironic eyebrow lift. At least one of SG-1 seemed to appreciate his arguments.

"Of course, sir." Carter's disappointment was obvious, but she hid it behind a professional mask. Just what he had hoped. Sorry, Carter.

At least he assumed disappointment was what she was hiding. He grew suspicious of the looks she was exchanging with Daniel and Teal'c. He recognized team unspoken communication. Jack turned forward again. Daniel and Teal'c were watching him. Daniel was trying to contain his excitement at heading south for Carter's sake, but there was something else hidden in his expression as he looked at Jack. Teal'c also was watching Jack as if he could see right through him. Maybe Jack hadn't been as subtle in his reasoning as he'd hoped. They'd gotten to know each other too well over the years. They probably could even see his mental struggling before he'd gotten to the coin flip, and knew exactly the reason why.

He avoided their gazes by grabbing another piece of coconut cream pie trying to keep the momentum. "I mean it, Daniel. I will come down and get you if need be."

Daniel's nod was sober. Damn it. They were reading him too well. Daniel replied, "Temporarily. Got it, Jack. I'll be back with SG-1 before you know it."

Jack was certain Daniel meant every word, but he didn't believe Daniel would be able to keep his promise once he found the Ancient toys to play with. Jack would end up having to go back to that blasted continent. Well, Elizabeth and Hammond were hinting at him to come down anyway, despite his not remembering anything about that chair.

That, however, would be another day. For now, he just enjoyed this moment. Hanging out with the team. He looked out over the scientists–geeks but, for the most part, the SGC's geeks, his geeks. It was rare he got to see the personnel like this: socializing, laughing, chatting. He didn't have a clue what they were chatting about, but he liked watching them in this casual moment when the fate of the galaxy wasn't at stake.

He made a note to himself to make sure Walter alerted him to important memos in the future, like those involving dessert on base. Pie day was definitely an event he would mark on his calendar.

Fin.


End file.
